Busy mind means scattered blog…

May 20, 2010

Wow, Thursday snuck up on me pretty quick! You guys will probably notice that I make a lot of references to how quickly time is moving and how unable I am to keep up with it. It happens to me a lot.

I’ve got a lot on my mind right now; moving, growing up, family, money, business…. a little of everything I guess. I’m so excited about moving, I know it’s going to do amazing things for my relationship with my Guy (yes, that’s his name) and my relationship with my parents, especially my mom. I’ve always been very close with my parents and being back home has made a few things change in my relationship with them. Hopefully getting out and being on my own again will mend some of the things that have been damaged.

I feel like I’m growing up a 2nd time. I moved out when I was 19, lived with my then fiance for 11 months and then moved into a house with an older man who was recently divorced (strictly roommates). Well, I moved my stuff in and spent the night at the house twice. The house was being partially remodeled and so the living room was basically drywall and the carpet was cut off at the stairs. I just didn’t feel like it was my space or that I was able to come and go as I needed to because he worked at 6 am and if I came in too late I felt like I was going to wake him when his dogs heard me come in. So my stuff lived there from July to November and then it joined me at my mom and dad’s… what I didn’t sell or throw away. I guess to explain that I need to back up and tell you why I went from having a fiance, to living in a man’s house… After 11 months of living together, my fiance of 2 years (boyfriend of 8 years before that… I’ll do the math for you, I was 11 years old when we first started ‘dating’) decided that he wanted to go home to Tennessee to go back to school (oh yeah, did I mention that 6 years of our relationship was long distance?!?!) So, he left and I was determined not to move back home just yet. I felt I was really ready to be on my own. Well, I was…until I realized that I  didn’t make enough money to take care of myself. I’ve been back at home since November of 2008… it’s time to grow up again.

My family has always meant the world to me. My parents have always been my closest friends… that doesn’t mean they were my best friends and I got away with everything… I just mean that I have always been able to tell them anything and they have always supported me in my decisions, even if they didn’t understand them. They’ve been the best parents anyone could ever ask for. My brother just turned 16 and I am so proud of the man he’s becoming. He is honest, he gets good grades, he treats his girlfriend with so much respect and he is incredibly loyal. My sister is 12 and she is also an amazing kid. She gets good grades, she tries to make things fair for everyone, she doesn’t partake in gossip, and she’s always doing some little project of her own. Like last night, he was on my laptop and when I looked at what she was doing she had been putting all these pics together in a collage in paint of things she wants in her new bedroom when I move out. Both are amazing kids. I am really just so proud of them.

Money and business kinda go together for me right now. I’m really excited about my business, and I think other people are getting excited about it too. I’ve heard from a few people that they’ve looked at the site not needing anything in particular and then deciding there was something they might just have to have! So that’s pretty cool. My computer genius boyfriend put an ad up on Craigslist for me last night and I need to create another one that’s not geared towards the band merch stuff. I’ve got some amazing friends that are helping me get my name out all over the place. If anyone has any ideas, please let me know I’m always up for a fresh idea. I’m only one person!

Life is good, you guys! I’m stressed and I have a lot on my mind but my life is really good. I have a few little things I’d like to improve upon, but in general I am loving my life!

I just want everyone to understand how important it is to love who you are…

Be bold, be you!

<3Shay

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